The Art of Pranks
by Rue Nightrose
Summary: Shikamaru has something planned for his wife, something.. Devious.


Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, or any of it's characters.

A smirk appeared on the normally lazy ninja's face. He stood at the foot of an incredibly large bed, clad in nothing but a silk robe. Dark locks of hair were pulled away from his handsome face. The jounin's narrowed eyes were sizing up his intended victim. She was sprawled in the middle of the expansive mattress, buried under dark violet blankets. A long, pale leg peeked out of the covers, as well as her head. He grinned and moved silently towards the sleeping kunoichi. Crawling over her slight form, the dark-haired man lowered his mouth to the exposed, delicate earlobe.

"Mmm, Shikamaru.." The woman sighed, trying to return into the warm cocoon of sleep.

Knowing he was closer to victory, Shikamaru ran his large hand up the smooth leg of his wife. She had no idea what he had in store for her. Crouched over her, he skimmed the tip of her ear with his skillful tongue. Instantly her eyes shot open as Ino tried to squirm out of his grasp. It was too late. The ever-knowing strategist had his platinum-blonde wife pinned.

"Shikamaru Nara, I swear if you even think of -" Her fiery threat had been dissipated with a soft breath at her ear. Ever since the first time they had become intimate, her husband had discovered all of the most sensitive parts on her body. 'My husband is much too smart for his own good.' Ino thought, and not for the first time.

Rough, calloused hands casually skimmed Ino's soft, pale thighs. The dewy glow on her skin was becoming all too obvious to the brilliant tactician, and Shikamaru knew that his tiny wife would soon be putty in his hands. He peeled the covers off of her unresisting form, replacing them with his hardened body. Moving his lips down from her ear, he nipped the lobe of it before kissing down his wife's delicate jawline.

Ino took shallow breaths, feeling the warmth of her husband's larger body seep into hers. His sleek, muscular physique never failed to get her blood pounding, and this morning was no exception. The way his dark eyes glinted at her, as if he wanted to ravage his wife's entire body.. Ino shuddered with anticipation.

Feeling her body move beneath him, Shikamaru nearly lost his resolve for his sinfully delicious plan. Nearly. With renewed vigor, his lips pressed against hers in a passionate lip-lock. As soon as she opened her mouth for him, the jounin pulled away from her. Her husband began nipping down her neck, earning small squeaks and sighs of pleasure. His roving hands moved towards her inner thighs, tracing the sensitive skin just outside of where she wanted him to be.

'Her guard is almost lowered..' Gleefully smirking, his other hand grabbed both of Ino's delicate wrists and pinned them underneath his weight. Ignoring her protest, Shikamaru continued his small nips until he was nearly to her ribs. He began moving his hands up higher, away from the platinum-blonde's shifting thighs. With an uncanny speed, Shikamaru powered chakra into the hand pinning her wrists and bound them, whilst shifting his weight on top of her.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE - " Ino's earsplitting shriek was interrupted when, with both hands, her evil husband went after the kunoichi's most vulnerable ticklish spots. Because her wrists were bound with chakra, and Shikamaru's weight was over her hips, Ino was completely and utterly trapped.

"AHAHA -HAHA -OH-SHI-AHAHA!" With dark satisfaction, Shikamaru's strong fingers skimmed and stroked all of her most ticklish spots. Under his slim wife's ribcage made her shriek with laughter while her soft underarms made her utterly breathless with laughter.

"GO-HA-KILL-YOU-AH!" Tears were nearly forming in her brilliant blue eyes as Ino squirmed desperately to get away from her husband's devilish ministrations.

Glancing up at the clock, Shikamaru noted what time it was. It may not be safe to come home after this, but the usually lazy ninja couldn't resist making his tiny wife angry. She was just too darn.. Adorable. He stopped torturing her, and grinned, looking down at her. Ino had gone from sleepy, to aroused, to flustered in just three minutes. His plan had worked perfectly. Her bosom heaved with her breaths, and she gave him the most threatening death-glare she could muster. He leaned down and gave Ino's nose a peck.

"I have a mission, it'll probably take a week or so." As he said this, the jounin grabbed his gear that had been packed earlier. Dressing hurriedly, he glanced at his wife once more.

"See you babe."

Ino felt the chakra dissolve as soon as her husband had jumped out of their window. Nearly blind with rage, she threw a pillow out after him. She had thought her husband would have been lazy, but this took the cake! Of all his evil plots, going after her ticklish spots!

Oh she would have her revenge. She would have it soon.

* * *

"How troublesome.." Shikamaru stood in front of the home he shared with his wife. It had been over a week since he had left on his mission, and the brilliant jounin had no idea how to enter his home without being skewered. His wife's temper was famous, only rival to her best friend. Well, there was only one way into this. Straight into the fire.

Feeling less bold than he had a week ago, Shikamaru entered the front door. He quickly assessed the surroundings, slightly surprised that there were no shuriken or kunai flying at him. Shrugging off his pack, he stepped quietly into the kitchen.

There, dressed in a sunny yellow dress complete with her frilly blue apron was his wife. Her beautiful platinum-blonde locks were pulled up into a ponytail, and he could smell her flowery perfume from the door frame. Ino spun around, her eyes sparkling at the appearance of her husband.

"Shika!" The woman squealed, flinging her slim arms around his muscular frame. "I've missed you."

Immediately all of Shikamaru's guards went up. He returned her hug, enveloping her soft body in his strong arms. However, he had his suspicions about his devious wife's sweet disposition. She was up to something. He leaned down to capture her lips in a kiss, and she returned it eagerly.

"Mm, Shika, we can get to that later." Ino said playfully as the kiss ended. She grabbed his jacket and stripped him of it, gesturing towards the table. "I made dinner, we can eat together."

'Oh great, she's going to try to poison me..'

Ino hummed softly as she zipped around their kitchen, bringing out all the necessary dishes and utensils. Shikamaru loved to watch his tiny wife run around, she practically glowed with energy. Once they were served, he sat back and met her eyes across the table. There was a moment of silence as they stared at each other.

"Aren't you going to eat your dinner, Shika?" Ino asked. He watched through narrowed eyes as she picked up her utensils, taking a bite of the food. He followed her example, slowly chewing through the dinner Ino had made. So the retribution would be subtler..

They finished their dinner, and wordlessly Shikamaru helped his cheery wife with the dishes. Afterwards, he possessively slung his arm around her waist as they retired to their favorite spot in the living room. Ino cuddled in his lap, Shikamaru finally felt the weariness from his mission start to catch up with him.

This is what she had been waiting for. Ino reached up and took out his hair tie, watching with satisfaction as his dark mane of hair came cascading down. Practically purring with satisfaction, the kunoichi ran her fingers through his silky locks. Although Shikamaru would never admit it, his hair was a point of pride for him.

"Come on, let's get you showered." Ino murmured, pulling her tired husband up from the couch. She led him into their bathroom. With seemingly endless energy, she turned the water on. While waiting for it to heat up, she slowly undressed her husband, noting with female satisfaction how incredible her husband looked.

'As much as I would love to get on that, it's time for some much needed reciprocation.' Ino suppressed a smirk.

She pushed the shower curtain open and let her husband step into the warm steam. Watching the spray that hit his chiseled chest made Ino want to stare at Shikamaru forever. Instead, she stripped her own clothes and got in behind him.

Shikamaru nearly groaned aloud at the feel of his wife's body against his. If he wasn't so tired, he would turn around and ravage her. Instead he submitted to the feel of a coarse loofah scrubbing the sweat, dirt and blood away from his skin. Soon Ino had finished cleansing his body and reached for his shampoo, pouring a handful out. Shikamaru felt his wife work his jet black hair into a lather and wanted to fall asleep at the amazing feel of her skillful fingers. Too soon it seemed, she was finished and they were drying off.

"Let's just go to bed." Ino whispered, tugging her exhausted husband into bed with her.

Shikamaru wrapped an arm around his wife's warm body, breathing in the soft scent of vanilla and violets. Perhaps she had just let it go.

* * *

Groggily, Shikamaru rolled over and reached for Ino. His hand met an empty space. The lazy shinobi cracked an eye open, trying to see if his wife was still here. Their room was empty, but a small post-it was on Ino's pillow.

'Probably some chores. How troublesome.' Shikamaru thought, grabbing the note. His dark eyes scanned her girly text, a nagging feeling rising up inside of him.

'Love ya! Having a girl's day and night!'

There was only one reason Ino would take a girl's day and night off after he got home from the mission. He sat up quickly, wondering just where her revenge would -

His hair, normally laying down his back in a smooth tangle was everywhere. Tight, curly, jet black pieces of hair floated all around his head. In a panic, Shikamaru nearly flew to the mirror. His hair stuck out in every direction. His hair made him a foot taller and wider on each side. Ino had given him an afro.

'I can't believe I let my guard down.'


End file.
